Doug Goodman

Texas Horror Writer. Cadaver Dog Handler.

Doug's Blog

Placenta Potpourri

Posted by douggoodman on January 29, 2012 at 10:10 PM

Okay, so I did something odd today.

 

The team is working on certifications, and our certification requirements direct us to use 15g or less of source material.  Since by circumstance I happen to have the other trainer's scent items, I decided to break out my trusty food-turned-dead-guy measuring scale and find out how much these items weigh.

 

Unfortunately, most things weigh a lot, and it is hard to measure the amount of placenta juice used say, in a placenta brick (quikcrete + placenta (placenta replaces the water)) or a placenta log.  So to be as scientific about it as I could, I decided to just measure it all and see what happens.

 

The results were not as good as I hoped.  WIth all the new scent materials we have acquired since November, only a few (less than 10% is my guess) fit within the range.  In the interest of full disclosure (because what is a blog if not full disclosure?), I have a lot of bloody gauze/rags that fit in that range.  However, a couple of years ago I spoke to some more knowledgeable people than me, and I asked them about blood because it was (at the time) our most abundant resource.  They said that blood is generally frowned upon because it does not create as much scent as other source types.  For certification, they recommended bone or flesh.  To bring it all full circle, this is why I completely ignored all my "bloody tissue" samples that fell in the <15g range.

 

So what went so wrong uring this little exercise in grotesquery?  I had been doing everything right, but then I got ambitious.  I decided to OPEN a placenta jar and pour the liquid into a children's medicine measuring cup, which I could then weigh to find out how full it needed to be to make 15g of scent.  I opened the Smucker's jar.  At first there was no problem.  About five second later the scent went nuclear.  It was stinkin EVERYWHERE.  And I mean everywhere, as in Gary Oldman screaming E-V-E-R-Y-O-N-E in The Professional.  Man, that was pervasive.  I thought smelly diapers were bad.  But year-old placenta?  That is a whole new level of stench.  Good Gawd!  That is some potent potpourri!

 

So if you are every going to work with the stinkables, and especially placenta, I highly recommend doing this work outside, either in the garage or in the backyard.  I got lucky and didn't drop any, but if I had dropped that jar and placenta soaked into the concrete...well, I think I'd be committed to not selling the house for another couple of years.

Categories: Cadaver Dog Sources/Scent Items

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